The Pushy Spouse

So,are you an artist? If so have you found anyone who will put up with you for more than a few weeks? How about months, a few years or even years on end? If so count yourself lucky. I sure would not put up with me. Not a chance. I am way too selfish for putting up with my spoiled moody artist attitude. Not to mention all the manic ramblings and near, oh be honest, completely narcissistic look on my life. Lets not forget others now. Far be it for me to fail and apply standards I would not, and will not, apply to myself to others. After all the world is “our” picnic and if we want to eat the cake before the deviled eggs we sure as heck can do just that. Right? We are artists!! We have the official, culturally approved license to be total self-absorbed jerks...ahem...eccentrics. It is our birthright!

...sorry, where was I? I had to step away for a bit while I was laughing and coughing.

Oh yes. I was just expounding on the obvious fact that we are immune to...well everything. Now if you agree with me on these very serious and salient facts about artistic life I would like to invite you to join me in my delusion. Just keep in mind that I am in fact the center of the universe and you will need to find a nice respectful orbit around me. I am sure some other part of the world will nudge out of the way so you to can bask in the glory that is me.

So do you think I am pushing the point a little hard? Maybe even a little too far? I do not think so. We are a selfish lot who more than anything want to do what we want to do when we want to do it. World be damned. Friends be damned. Even spouse be damned. Be vary careful oh reader of my blog post. It matters not if you are the artist themselves or their, friend, lover or spouse. Is it only co-incidence that both artist and lonely are spelled with 6 letters?

If you are in fact an artist, not a hobbiest or weekend craft artisan; if you are in fact that holy grail of self-absorption that is the professional fine artist...well fall down on your knees and thank God that some one other than yourself loves you enough to put up with your self-righteous garbage. Do not let them go. No matter what. Of equal or even greater worth than the gift that allows you to see the world as an artist is the gift that person represents to you as an artist.

The mere fact that they will even put up with you tells me all I need to know about their character. They are everything we are not. Patient. Giving. Steadfast. Reliable. Forgiving. The list goes on and on. And on. As a matter of fact the only flaw they probably have is the same one we have. Well one of our many flaws. They probably think we are as valuable as we think we are ourselves. Fools.

Do they get mad? Of course. Disappointed? Of course. Do you feel guilty when they pay the bills because you did not sell anything? Of course you do. Do they hate you for it? I doubt that very much. They would have been gone long, long ago if that were the case. So let me tell you. Do not take your guilt or inflated self-worth or frustration and direct it at the one person who is right there with you. They are there because they love you and they are making your being a professional artist possible in many cases. They deserve better than you lashing back at them just because they asked if you painted today. Or heaven forbid asked why you have not been creating anything for months on end. Maybe they even deserve better when they tell you to get your blog post written before you do anything else. NOW!

Just smile, give them a kiss, a hug or a thanks, I Love You too. They’ve earned it. The people who love and support you are never a burden or a bother. They are your greatest gift. Treat them as such.

-STUCKEY-

Comments

[Anne Hamilton]

On Self Absorption:
Jeez...now I know why I have been alone for the past 14 years...well, except for Sassie, my cat, and she stays hidden from me most of the time. I have gotten over thinking that I'm Michelangelo - now "that" was self-absorption. I had rather be Leonardo any ways. But I'm thinking of becoming Georgia o'keefe. Maybe I'm not self-absorbed; maybe I'm just weird. The only thing that really matters is that I am what I say I am - a " " good artist.
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